Nick of time 4: Robbin' Hood
Nick of time 4:
Robbin' Hood:
MuTeens NYC HQ: Nick's Basement Level:
After returning from Dimension X, Nick was assembling the Arcade 1up Collection plus some custom made cabinets that ran legally dubious software. Grace and My'lee were helping Nick assemble the cabinets, while Conchita was making Bao Buns with Samantha.
"Girls, I need a break!" Said Nick as he grabbed a quart of milk and drank it Hazuki style next to the waste bin.
The elevator doors opened and April came out the elevator. "Nick, we need to talk." Said April.
"Not here. Walls have ears and are gossipy. Yes my cutie patooties I'm talking about you. I love you but you girls share everything. Yes that also includes your moms. To the rooftop!" Said Nick as he entered the elevator with April after grabbing an empty bottle of water.
---
Rooftop
After opening the door, Nick began monologuing. I did not hit her! That it's not true. It's bullshit.l! I did not hit her. I did not! Ohai April" Said Nick as he threw the bottle on the floor.
April facepalmed at the reference to The Room. "OK you're not angry at me, that's good." Said April.
"I already did this in 2044... but old news for me new news for you and I'm gonna fuck up the timeline." Said Nick. "This is your cue to stop me from ficking the timeline, Renet!"
"Oh! It's OK. This is a flexible point in the timeline. The 2044 sex is canon." Said Renet as she popped out of . "What can change is the amount of it from here to there, but April still marries Casey. At best you get farewell sex." Said Renet before leaving down the roof access like a normal person. "Once you're done here, it's Chrono Trigger time!" Said Renet as she popped her head once more before leaving.
"So, I guess I got spoiled and learned that I'm going to be Mrs. Jones." Said April. "I also saw the videos from future me." April tried to approach Nick, but he kept his distance.
"April. I love you like a child loves. You are my first love. No one can take that away from me. I love you like a man does... but we're not meant to be. It hurt like hell. Having my heart broken like that.Especially especially when the guy you chose is Casey fucking Jones! The guy has Loser written all over him! But he's 'Normal' or as close to it in a world with Mutant Turtles and Interdimensional demidemon space princes. I get it. I hate it, but I understand." Said Nick with tears in his eyes."I only want To know one thing: Did you actually had any feelings for me?"
April sighed. "I didn't, I do..." tears began streaming down her face. "I love you Nick, but I can't be with you. The love I have for you is not how a heterosexual woman loves a man. I love you like a normal sister loves a little brother. I'm a selfish lover. I wouldn't be able to share you..
If I could love you that way." Said April. "I want to give you the closure you want in 2024, but today is not safe... speaking of not safe..." April slapped Nick. She huffed before continuing. "After you left my apartment, you did some heroics and had your way with a woman... Specifically, My Boss's sidepiece, Tiffany, who was on her unsafe days. She wants to see you." Said April. "She's been pestering Burne about wanting to meet the MuTeens! Guess who were tasked to do so?"
*Padre, yo tengo un guanajo. Sale el Cura y dice ¿Vas a seguir jodiendo con el guanajo?*
"¿Si, Tío Julio?" Said Nick.
"El señor Thompson quiere verte." Said Julio mildly distracted. "Hector says Hi."
"Díle hola al tío Hector de mi parte." Said Nick. "Enjoy Aruba!"
Nick sighed. "Yeah, the whole Burne thing will have to wait until I return from whenever Renet sends me." Said Nick. "I said, I have to do time travel shenanigans. That's your cue, Renet!"
Renet went back upstairs to the rooftop access. "Yeah, you better tie that loose end before I can do Time travel stuff! Oops! I forgot to put the left girl back in! Commented Renet as she stuffed her boob back in her leotard. April began making signs.
"You also forgot to cover up your downstairs." Said April.
Renet's face turned red... "that's a preview for Nick's future, then!" Said Renet
"Chop chop! Fix that Tiff fiasco before you travel!"
"Fine! Let's go to Channel 6 then!" Said Nick as he went back downstairs while changing clothes via inventory menu.
As they reach the Garage, Nick noticed April's Bike.
"I didn't know you rode bikes." Said Nick. "Mom was Into bikes... I'm still learning how to ride them without VG Logic."
"Hop in!" Said April as Nick straddled the bike behind April"Hang on!" Said April as she placed Nick's hands on the passenger handles. She exited at high speeds while Nickwas thankful for the handles...
***
Channel 6:
April and Nick enter the building and Nick is a bit disappointed that Irma wasn't at the front desk. As they head up the elevator, Vernon Prindle enters as well.
"Ah, O'Neil! I see you found the reclusive GameDude. Lately, he's been the least seen MuTeen and they have an actual Ninja. For being the PR person of the MuTeens, he's been hiding out too much ever since the tournament." Said Prindle.
"Family Matters, my dear Prindle." Replied Nick.
"Good to know you're still around, kid! Keep up the good fight!" Said Prindle as he got off the elevator. Fenwick saw Nick and turned around to go in the opposite direction. Once they reached Burne's office, April knocked on the door.
"I'm busy!" Yelled Burne.
"Mr. Thompson, The GameDude is here." Said April.
"What are you waiting for, O'Neil, enter!" Said Burne as he was on the phone. "Baby, he's here, come to the Channel now." Said Burn before hanging up. "Ah, Senor Cade, so nice to have you here." Said Burne. "O'Neil, don't you have some news story about the Turtles to work on?" Said Burne as he was shooing out the reporter. "How's it going? We heard that Paramount wants to make a MuTeens movie and they're currently eying David S. Goyer as the writer and eying McG and Zack Snyder in their director short list. They should be contacting you soon." Said Burne.
"Burne, Burne, Burne. Cut to the chase." Said Nick. "Just tell me why you called me, so we can deal with this."
"I got divorced recently and I intend to marry my girlfriend, but I can't have kids." Said Burne. "So, we're looking into a surrogate father and you have the qualities I need for a kid."
Nick looked at Burne with disbelief. "So, you want me to jerk off in a cup and then have a doctor put my baby batter on your girl?" Asked Nick with incredulity.
Burne began to stammer and adjusting his necktie as a buxom blonde in her early 30s barges into the office. Nick recognized her but played along.
"Burnsie, you found him!" Exclaimed Tiffany as she hugged and kissed Burne before Addressing Nick. "Did you accept Burnsie's offer?" Asked Tiffany before Hugging Nick.
"I haven't forgotten you and your cock... I need to have it again." She whispered as she stepped away from Nick and returned to Burne.
"Alright, make the arrangements so I can go to the lab and produce my seed." Said Nick as Toffany looked pissed.
"Burnsie! Remember the story about Vernon discovering that spermbanks were inserting the wrong material? If we want our kid to look as handsome as Mr. Dude, we need to make sure his seven is used on me." Said Tiffany annoyed.
Burne began to stutter as he realized the 100% sure option was for Nick to do it the old fashioned way with Tiffany. A-all right. Nicholas, c-can I call you Nick? C-can you f-f-fuck Tiff?" Burne said with a lot of frustration in his voice.
Nick took a seat and began to think. "Just to be sure. You want me to have sex with Ms. Tiffany in order for me to impregnate her?" Said Nick.
Burne nodded and Tiffany whispered something on Burne 's ear. He seemed mad but relented.
"Not just t-that, but Tiff wants to be a-able to have at least o-one day a month for c-c-casual sex with you for as l-l-long as you both live." Burne Replied defeated.
"Let me call my lawyer and he'll send a contract for your lawyer to verify the terms and once both parties agree to the terms, we can proceed." Said Nick as he texted Alberto. Tiffany was pouting.
"Burnsie, why do we have to do the lawyer stuff?" Asked an annoyed Tiffany.
"This contract is to protect YOU, Tiffany. It's not Adultery if you and Burne consent of me being a stress release/impregnate you... among other things to avoid any of the parts getting screwed over." Said Nick. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to do my Superheroic duty. I must point out I'll be off-world dealing with the aftermath of Dregg's failed invasion. But once I come back and the contract is OK'd by all parts, I'm making you a Mommy, Tiff!" Said Nick before leavng.
---
Outside Channel 6:
Nick kept waiting for Tifany to come out the building and approached her once she passed near the alley he was waiting for her.
"Tiffany, we need to talk." Said Nick as he beckoned her to follow him.
"If this is about the baby, well..." Tiffany stopped talking when Nick put his finger on her lips and she began to suck it.
"Stop it, Tiffany!" Said Nick. "I wanted to apologize for that night."
"I'll forgive you when you cover me in your cum." Said Tiffany while walking her fingers on Nick's chest. "I know you have a few girlfriends and I know I'm older than you and you can swap me for younger models. I just want to have some fun with you and a child, so I can settle down with Burnsie. I was resigned to a sexless life until you gave me the best sex ever!" Said Tiffany. "That's all Rayray... But before you go, can I at least get a taste?" Pleaded Tiffany as Nick grabbed her.
"Not on an alley." Said Nick as he blindfolded her and took her to a nearby cheap hotel. As they entered the room Nick grabbed her phone and set an alarm.
"Hey! What are you doing with my phone!?" Exclaomed Tiffany.
"Setting an alarm for you to get up tomorrow. The room has been paid for. If you raid the mini fridge, YOU will have to pay for it. They have a continental breakfast. That's what the alarm is for. I won't be staying for it." Said Nick as he stripped. Tiffany stripped as well and this was the first time he truly saw her naked. She obviously exercised, had a nice natural rack and a cute light brunette landing strip. "Carpet don't match with the drapes." thought Nick as he had Tiffany lie down with her head hanging by the edge of the bed. Gently Nick began pushing his dick down her throat. No feelings, this was just mechanical as Tiffany eagerly devoured his dick.
Letting out the occasional grunt made Tiffany feel a but better. The only thing that looked remotely fun were Tiffany's breasts. As he came down her throat, Nick began fondling her breasts. Swiftly, he flipped unto the bed and began sucking on her breasts.
"Can you move on? Unless you're putting your cock between my tits, leave them alone." Said Tiffany mildly annoyed.
"That's too bad because my favorite act is sucking on breasts." Replied Nick as he kept on playing with and sucking on Tiffany's breasts. Nick used some of his Incubus powers to entice Tiffany a bit more. She began moaning as Nick played with her nipples. Once satisfied, Nick flipped out of the bed and helping Tiffany stand.
"Kneel before cock!" Said Nick while making a bad Terrence Stamp impression. Tiffany knelt and sandwiched Nick's dick between her boobs and began rubbing it. Also she began spitting on it and kept rubng the spit lubed cock while Nick kept pumping mechanically.
Once he came, Nick raised Tiffany to the bed and had her sit by the edge. " Allow me to go down under were the women glow and I'll plunder." Said Nick as he dove into her nether region and explored her lewd cavity with his mouth. It didn't take long for Tiffany to whine.
"Give it to me, pleeeeaaaaassssseeee!" She said as Nick unenthusiastically penetrated her. Going by muscle memory alone, Nick gave Tiffany an amazing orgasm.
"Get some medium sized butt plugs and start wearing them for me. Next time we meet I'm going to invade Uranus." Said Nick as he picked her up and took her to the bathroom for a shower. Once clean, he laid Tiffany on the bed and left.
***
MuTeens NYC HQ Rooftop:
Nick arrived to the rooftop and Renet was waiting for him with Barbara.
"Nicolás Ramón Barril." Said Barbara with a hint of anger. "We all saw your little stunt with Burne's girlfriend. What in the hell was that!?"
"Goddammit, Renet! Why were you showing everyone that!?" Said Nick.
"I simply showed them WHY you Don't Fuck!" Said Renet. "They're aware of the contract with Burne."
"I don't mind the sleeping around. You're an Incubus. You're supposed to do that. But that bored performance!? What the fuck, Nick!" Exclaimed Barbara.
"She has a nice body, but that's it. My brain was thinkong all the ways I could kill her, because she was so annoying! I'd rather stick my dick in crazy... If I was a girl, she would've made me Sahara. But, now here comes the time travel shenanigans. Where To, Renet?" Asked Nick.
"England 1269... Remember what I told you about Archery?" Said Renet. "Well, You'll need it as you'll be..." Barbara's eyes widened.
"No..." said Barbara as Redd and Mr. Cade came up wearing green tunics and tights.
"We're men... we're men in tights
We roam around the forest looking for fights.
We're men... we're men in tights.
We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right." Sang the partially drunk former EPF agents as Nick couldn't stop laughing.
"Wait... I'm going to be Robin of Locksley? I'm going to unmaid Marian? Yes!! After fucking that insipid bimbo, banging Maid Marian is exactly what I need!" Said Nick. Babs sighed.
"So, being a legendary hero is not as exciting?" Barbara asked a bit miffed.
"Maid Marian is supposed to be beautiful and badass!" Said Redd. "She's a feminist icon! Of course It's Nick's sacred duty to sen her back to the kitchen! Amirite? Cades?"
"No, Redd." Said Mr. Cade. "He's supposed to liberat her from society's shackles with his penis." Both Redd and Nick Sr. Began laughing. "Use VG Logic to purify ANYTHING you eat or drink in the distant past." Said Nick Sr. "Your 2024 stomach isn't ready for 1269 bacteria and viruses. That includes eating Maid Marian's hair pie."
"Beavis and Butt-Head are right!" Said Renet. "In any case Allons-y!"
***
Sherwood Forest: Merry Men camp:
Nick awoke covered in bandages.
"Ugh!"*
*= ALL TEXT WILL BE INSTANTLY TRANSLATED TO MODERN ENGLISH. WRITING IN YE OLDE ENGLISH IS NO FUN.
"Are you OK, Robin?" Said a Tall Strong looking man. "You should've been dead from the fall you took. Luckily the Moor found you."
Nick stood up wobbly as Little John gave him a branch to use as a crutch. "A Moor in these lands? That's peculiar." Said Nick as he was wondering what was going on
"Yes, he lives in the abandoned Chapel of David, Azeem Nazir Ashú" He nursed you for a few days until Friar Tuck was able to bring you to Sherwood." Said Little John. "Will! Help Robin Remove the bandages, as it's been two days and there are no signs of blood or pustules. My hands aren't small enough.Will's hands are far more delicate." Little John laughed as a small effeminate man came over to Nick. "Ah, Master Robin, good to see you walking about!" Nick stared confused at the obvious girl dressed like a man.
"You're Will Scarlet, as in Wilhelmina Scarlett?" Whispered Nick.
"Yup! The Merry Men don't know I'm a woman. They think I'm the bottom in our sodomite relationship." Said Will... "it's the only way the Merry Men would obey me." Said Will as she removed the bandages from Nick's face.
"Mirror..." said Nick as he touched his face. It felt normal, but he had that stupid Green Arrow beard and mustache. "Even with this stupid face hair I look good." Said Nick as he stared into Wilhelmina's eyes. "Will, I don't remember much since the falll. Where can we go for me to sodomize you." Said Nick to a blushing Will who began dragging Nick to a small clearing hidden from the camp. There, Will removed her tunic and tights leaving her only with bandages that kept her chest bound and a small loincloth. As Nick removed ther wrap and loincloth, he secretly cast Esuna and Curaga to ensure that Will was safe for 21st Century sex. Surprised, Nick began fondling Wilhelmina's large breasts
As she moaned the moment Nick began suxking on them.
"Breasts this beautiful should always be free, my dear Wilhelmina." Said Nick as he alternated between them.
"Robin, don't say such things, as Marian's are far prettier than mine." Said Will blushing. Rubbing her tuft of strawberry blonde pubes, Nick made Will cum.
"Are you this eager for me, Will?" Said Nick as he removed his codpiece and laid down on the ground. "Sit on my face and put my meat saber in your mouth Will." Said Nick as Wilhelmina began to eagerly suck Nick's dick. Nick responded by diving into Will's muff. Both came hard. Little John entered the Clearing.
"Robin! Friar Tuck comes with news... Will? You're a woman!? Ah that makes so much sense now." Said Little John. "Robin, Friar Tuck is... I'll let you two finish." Said Little John before leaving.
"Cat's out of the bag, Ms. Scarlet." Said Nick as he laid Wilhelmina down and aimed his flesh arrow at her Quiver. "You heard John... we must finish before seeing Friar Tuck!" Said Nick as he penetrated Wilhelmina Scarlet's eager cunt.
"I like this new vigor within you, Robin!" Said Will as Nick kept thrusting.
"Well, after staring death in the face and saying 'Not today!' One feels so much excitement for life, and what is lovemaking? The act of celebrating life, my dearest Will." Said Nick as he kept thrusting before passionately kissing Will. The stimulus from both dick and lips made Will cum hard and she fainted. Nick hugged the Merry woman's he kept shooting his load inside her.
Once Will recovered they got dressed and went to see Friar Tuck.
"Robin, Wilhelmina." Said Friar Tuck. "I knew all along. I'm surprised it took Little John this long."
Nick was a bit antsy. "Tuck, my dear friend and confidant, what has brought you to Sherwood?" Nick said as he readjusted his codpiece.
"Yes. King Henry III and the Sheriff of Nottingham are dabbling in Satanic arts in order to get you. A Witch called Zenobia is helping them to take you down."
"Meemaw..." Nick muttered. "I am not afraid of the witch. King Henry WILL learn the hard way, why the Lionheart was far superior than him and his lousy father, John. It is not only my duty, but my desire to bring Justice to the land until a TRUE successor to Our King Richard appears." Said Nick with renewed vigor. "Let me guess. The witch suggested an Archery Tournament to draw me out."
Friar Tuck and Will were shocked. "What kind of sorcery is this, Master Robin!" Said Friar Tuck.
"It's not sorcery, my friend. It's knowledge. You attract a fat man by offering food. You attract courtesan by offering a different kind of sausage." Said Nick while Will blushed. "What better bait to trap Robin Hood other than Maid Marian? Archery."
"It makes sense, Master Robin." Said Friar Tuck. "The Tournament is Tomorrow."
"Well, that leaves Very little time to prepare." Said Nick. I need a red Tunic and some sewing material. I have a costume to make.
***
Next Day: King Henry's Palace:
The King was breaking fast with the Sheriff and Zenobia, who was silent.
"Locksley is here. Using her might not be necessary." Said Zenobia as she ate.
"Good. We need to make an example out of him. Do not fail me now." Said Henry as he ate. The Sheriff nodded and ate.
---
Tournament grounds:
Nick walked the grounds in disguise as well as John and Will. There were tens of Bowmen getting ready. The French Archer had Nick curious. Tall, Redheaded, only sporting a cape and blue tights. He was accompanied by a black boy wearing a similar attire to him.
"Bonjour monsieur, my name is Beau and this is my squire, Kyle. I regret to inform you that you will not win the tournament. I'd say, my squire will fare better than you three. I'm so sorry mademoiselle, you went through all this trouble to compete just to be eliminated by my squire." Said Beau in a thick French accent full of French condescension. "Besides, I'm only here to defeat the man known as Robin Hood."
"Master Beau, I don't think it's smart to tell this riff-raff about our mission." Said Kyle.
"Well, then, Beau, may the best man win." Said Nick
The Sheriff of Nottongham stood before a podium. "Ladies and Gentlemen, our Beloved King Henry has brought forth the best Archers of Britannia and beyond on this great tournament to prove themselves as the Supreme Bowman. The winner will not only receive this Gilded Bow and golden Arrow as a sogn of supremacy, but the hand of the lovely Maid Marian." Said the Sheriff.
"It's on like Donkey Kong..." muttered Nick.
"Archers, get ready, aim, FIRE!!" Exclaimed the Sheriff as arrows flew and hit their targets. After evaluating the results only ten Archers hit their targets.
"The Archer with the blue arrows, please step up!" Said the Sheriff as Little John stepped up. He was wearing a wig made out of black wool with his eyebrows dyed. "What is your name sir?" Asked the Sheriff.
"Hugo Andore" Said Little John. "But my friends call me Andore the Giant!"
"Very well, Andore the Giant passes to the next round!" Said the Sheriff as he walked to Kyle.
"You! You are black! You passed to the next round!" Said the Sheriff as Kyle looked angry.
"Excuse me!? What do you mean I pass because I'm black?" Said Kyle in an antagonistic manner.
"Your arrows are black, therefore you hit the bullseye and qualified for the next round, boy." Said the Sheriff.
"My bad!" Said Kyle.
"The heart shaped arrow belong to Beau and he passed to the next round." Said the Sheriff as he pulled a Verdant arrow. "Green Arrow!"
"My name is Olivia Queen! I am the Green Arrow!" Exclaimed Wilhelmina.
"My word, a Woman Archer! Nonetheless, you passed to the next round. The orange stripped arrow passed to the next round!" Exclaimed the Sheriff as a man with both legs on pegs waddled towards the Sheriff.
"My name is Errol Fuchs, You can call me Crane. I served under the kings father until my legs were gone."
"Your service to the crown is appreciated. The red stripped arrow belongs to?" Said the Sheriff as a man wearing a black mask stepped up.
"My name is Rob- Westley Robert's, the dreaded Archer of the sea. Some people call me a pirate, but I am a Corsair, working for our Britannia." Said Westley using an impeccable English accent.
"Red Arrow, solid Red Arrow?" Yelled the Sheriff as a man wearing a stereotypical Robin Hood outfit walked towards the Sheriff.
"That would be me. They call me many names, but I am the reason this tournament is held. For I am Robin Hood!" Said the man. "If you're going to Arrest me, Rottingham, do it after the tournament!" Said the fake Robin Hood.
"I will see to it, Robin Hood!" Said the Sheriff. "The arrow with the bird head?"
Nick stepped up. "My name is Ricardo el Petirrojo Tapia... like the bird... Robin. You may call me Robin the Boy Wonder." Said Nick as he revealed his Robin outfit includong Domino mask. Zenobia facepalmed. King Henry was curious.
"Have you found Robin Hood?" Asked Henry.
"I have my suspicions, but it's too early to tell." Said Zenobia. "Both the Sheriff and I have two Archers in the game. It's up to him to reveal himself."
"The grey arrow? Who is the owner of the Grey Arrow? Asked the Sheriff as a little grey man approached the Sheriff...
"They call me NPC and I'm unimportant and the arrow is mine." Said NPC as he returned to his place.
"Final successful arrow is the purple arrow!" Exclaimed the Sheriff as a purple clad Archer claimed the arrow as his.
"My name is Robbin Hood! I rob from the rich and give to the poor. I am here to steal King Henry's bounty and give it to the poor."
"Another pretender!?" Nick muttered. "I'LL SHOW THEM..."
"THE NEXT ROUND BEGONS SOON!" Exclaimed the Sheriff. "Archers! All you have to do is hit This!" The Sheriff revealed a wooden button about the size of a dime. The new target was set. The archers readied themselves.
"I forgot to mention. There is only ONE target." Said the Sheriff as the archers stood worried. "Ready, aim, FIRE!"
The archers released their arrows andit was chaos. Out of the ten Archers only three got close enough to the goal as the button shattered when Nick's arrow hit it.
"Robbin' Hood, Beau, and Ricardo advance to the finals." Said the Sheriff. "Hit the bullseye at 300 yards. Archers will shoot their arrow one at a time. May the best man win."
Robbin readied himself to fire his arrow when he sneezed and missed. Unbeknownst to him, Kyle had thrown some white pepper in the air. Robbin's arrow missed. Beau took his position and shot his arrow. It hit right on the Bullseye.
"You won't beat that, Boy Blunder" Said Beau as Nick took position. Right before firing Beau hit Bick on the back of the leg with his bow, forcing Nick's arrow to fly erratically. Using VG Logic, Nick redirected the arrow and it split Beau's arrow. Beau was Cursing in french. The Sheriff of Nottingham returned to the podium.
"Archer Beau gets another attempt! If he can split Ricardo's arrow, he'll win. If not, Ricardo wins!"
Beau Readied his bow and let the arrow fly. Nick put a barrier at his arrow, which caused Beau's arrow to deflect to the side.
"The winner is Ricardo Tapia, or should I say, Robin of Locksley! Seize him!" Said the Sheriff as various guards try to capture Nick. Using his bow, Robin mNages to disarm a guard and take his sword.
"I love me a good swashbuckling fight!" Said Nick as he fended off the guards. Little John, Will, and the rest of the Merry Men attacked.
"Retreat! My Merry Men, I'll save Marian and catch up to you." Said Nick as he knew the trap would be activated soon.
"But Robin!" Exclaimed Will.
"No buts, do as I say! You'll understand soon!" Said Nick as John grabbed Will and retreated.
"Oh Henry, you're an even bigger coward than your father." Said Nick. "Now this is the part where Latrine shows up Holding Marian with a poisoned knife and says 'Surrender Robin of Locksley unless you want to stain your hands with the blood of Maid Marian!' in order to force me to surrender."
"So you read the script, Nick! Surrender or else Marian Dies!" Said Zenobia before Cackling. Nick drops his weapons and let's himself being taken to the witch's quarters.
***
Zenobia's Quarters:
Nick woke up on a rack tied by his arms and legs. Next to the rack was a Gilded cage with Marian inside. A woman with curly red hair was sitting in the cage. She was sobbing.
"Marian?" Said Nick "Marian, I'm here and I'll save you!" The cage's door flew open as Maroan came out and turned into Zenobia.
"Foolish Nick! Maid Marian is not here! You're here to learn another Demon Art..." said Lilith as she transformed herself into her usual form.
"You can release me now, Meemaw." Said Nick slightly annoyed.
"Show me your Incubus form first." Said Lilith
Nick growled. As his hair and eyes glowed red, a startling metamorphosis occurs. Turning into a horned beast, Nick tried to break off his restraints but was unable to.
"That's not your Incubus form, boy!" Said Lilith. "That is Wrath! Oh yes, we can tap into the other six sins, but your main alignment is Lust. My witch disguise is tapping unto Envy. This is me tapping into wrath." Said Lilith as she transformed into a dragon. "You have subconsciously tapped into this power without knowing it. Now you WILL Master it!' Exclaimed Lilith as she transformed into a red haired Demon with bat wings on her head and torso.
Nick tried hard but he kept summoning the wrath form... "I can't do it!"
"I'm disappointed in you, my little Incubus. Here I thought that giving your love to Marilith was a greater power... pathetic!" Replied Lilith as she laughed.
"Screw it!" Said Nick as he became pudgier and with Cat-like features. "What day is it?" Asked Nick.
"Monday" said Lilith.
"Fuck Mondays!" Said Nick as he went to sleep.
"Wait, you.unlocked Sloth Form! Why are you a Bipedal cat?"
"Because Love is Lasagna, Meemaw..." said Nick. "Can't you send yourself to Abu Dhabi? I'm too hungry to do it, by the way, when are we eating?"
"Very funny, Nicholas. You just combined forms by channeling Garfield!" Exclaimed Lilith with annoyance. "Still no lust form!"
Nick tried again but instead became an eight armed freak...
"That's greed..." said Lilith. "Your obsession with getting monstrous appearances reeks of Ben 10."
Nick tried again. He grew an armor reminiscent of Dracula's armor from the Coppola film but with a Batman styled cape. Breaking the chains and standing tall, Nick grinned. "How about that, Meemaw?"
"Pride..." that's a good looking form, but not the right one. "Lust... You're the avatar of lust, take your true shape!"
Nick turned into a fat balding man... "Shit! This is envy!" Said Nick before turning back to normal... "Meemaw! You fucking cunt! I AM THE AVATAR OF LUST! MY TRUE FORM IS ME!" Said Nick excitedly.
"Wrong!" Said Lilith. "You wear the disguise of normalcy... show me your True form!"
Nick closed his eyes and his hair turned red and grew shoulder length.
"There's the true Nick!" Said Lilith. "Try using your abilities!" Nick was able to feel more energy. Like Tony Montana on cocaine. He was able to tap into the other forms WITHOUT transforming as he returned to Normal Nick.
"That is Sin Harness." Said Lilith. "Null and I unlocked that ability by killing our siblings. You technically learned it when you killed me. Now go save Maid Marian and return to your time."
Lilith magicked a corpse and vanished. The door unlocked and Nick crept outside.
***
Marian's chambers:
Marian was locked on the hoghest tower of the castle with a window that allowed her to see the world, but not be in contact with it. Ever since the witch Zenobia showed up, Marian became a "guest" of King Henry III. Being cooped up was making her restless and waiting for Robin Hood to save her was a fool's game. She had a plan.
***
Castle Hall:
Nick arrived at the Hall when he noticed various armored guards patrolling.
"This Hall is giving me MGS vibes. The armors might be problematic for a stealth approach. I may have to pull a Mrrl!" Thought Nick in Solid Snake's voice. Using his dagger and a plate, Nick made some noise, attracting a guard. After disposing of the guard and taking his sword, Nick looked at the armor with disdain.
"I'm Robin Fucking Hood! I don't NEED to hide to kick ass!" Exclaimed Nick. "I'm Motherfucking Robin Hood!" Running back to the main Hall, Nick was screaming a very Darkwing-esque introduction.
"I am the terror that frees your tax! I am the blister on the Sheriff's fat ass! I am the purloiner of I'll gained fortunes! I am the arrow of Justice! I am Robin Hood!" Exclaimed Nick as the guards turned to face him.
"Seize him!" Exclaimed the Sheriff. As the Soldoers ran towards Nick the doors to the Hall were burst open as if hit by a battering ram.
It was Little John and the Merry Men busting in to aid Robin.
"Robin, get Marian! We'll deal with Rottingham's men!" Exclaimed Will as she pulled out her saber.
The Sheriff lunged towards Nick who parried his attack. "Getting old, my dear Sheriff! I guess Azeem Nazir Ashú should replace you..."
Said Nick.
"An African Sheriff? Britannia is a Christian Nation and they'll never accept a Moor as Sheriff!" Said the Sheriff.
"You were supposed to say: 'A black sheriff?' So I could've said: 'It worked on Blazing Saddles!' But you ruined it for me." Said Nick as he kept defending from the Sheriff's attacks. Using his dagger, Nick disarmed the Sheriff and with a few deft slashes, he marked the Sheriff's cuirass with RH.
"Now I get it, Don Diego..." said Nick as he Caged The Sheriff, who fell down to a dishonorable attack. Henry was blubbering in fear when he saw the Sheriff fall. "You have failed this Kingdom." Said Nick. 'I'm here for Marian and your coffers. Because I rob from the rich and give to the poor!" Exclaimed Nick. "Taking the life of an old man who shits his bed is not honorable even to the Prince of Thieves. But I'mwilling to make an exceptionfor you..."
"Take the money and the girl, just spare me!" Begged Henry.
"Merry Men, you heard the king! It's Robbin' Time!" Said Nick as he ran to the higher levels looking for Marian. While climbing up, he began to sing in operatic voice:
"You are, my fire. The one, Desire. Believe when I say that I want it that way!"
***
Marian's chambers:
As Marian was about to open the door, Nick opens it and is finally face to face with Marian. He freezes as his jaw drops. Seeing Marian for the first time was an experience for Nick.
"Robin?" Said Marian. "You haven't said anything."
"Sorry, but I forgot how beautiful you were. Last few days have been foggy, but your radiance has shone and dispelled the Darkness, my dearest darling." Said Nick as he handed Marian his sword.
"Good... Now my beloved let's show the Sheriff Who's the boss!" Said Marian with a devilish grin.
"Ladies first!" Exclaimed Nick as he grabbed another sword and watching Marian going Medieval on the armored knights. "Remind me not to piss off Maid Marian" Said Nick to himself as he cut a rope holding a chandelier to propel himself in the classic swashbuckling ways of Errol Flynn. "It's not over yet!" Exclaimed Nick as he swung across the hall and cornered the Sheriff. "You won't get away so easily." Said Nick as the Sheriff began fighting Nick. "You've made Marian angry. You wouldn't like her when she's angry."
The Sheriff turned around and was greeted by a pommel to the face and added some MM slashes on his cuirass. "Robin, Marian, over here! Exclaimed Will as Little John and her were riding a carriage full of valuables. Without thinking twice, bit Nick and Marian jumped to the carriages roof. "Here you go, big brother!" Said Eill as she handed Nick a bow and arrows.
"The others?" Asked Nick.
"Halfway to deliver the goods. We're the only ones left!" Said John. "Hold on to your butts!" Said John as they began leaving the castle. Using VG Logic, Nick incapacitated the pursuing guards.
"Marian, I need more Arrows." Said Nick as Will and Marian were feeding him arrows.
"You won't get away Locksley!" Yelled the Sheriff as he gallopped at full speed ahead.
Grabbing a gauntlet, Will stuffed it with an apple and stabbed an arrow to it. Nick Smiled.
"Sheriff! You have failed this Shire!" Exclaimed Nick as he let loose the Oliver Queen Special at the Sheriff, who fell by impact from the gauntlet. "I shot the sheriff
But I didn't shoot no deputy, oh no, oh" as Robin and company fled the scene.
---
Sherwood Forest: Merry Men camp:
Nick and the rest of his party finally arrived to the camp. Celebration abound, the Merry Men brought food and drinks to the Late arrivals. Nick secretly cast Esuna on his food and drink before eating. Both Marian and Will hung by each arm until they took Nick to the clearing where he made love to Will. "I'll leave you two alone. Don't do anything you wouldn't do to me, big brother!" Said Will as she left. Marian was blushing.
"So, did you see the Tournament?" Said Nick.
"Yes, It was from a different perspective than the normal public, but yes." Replied Marian. "I knew in my heart that you would win." She approached Nick for a kiss but hesitated at the last moment. "Robin... I want you." Nick kissed Marian as he held her by her waist and caressing her curly brunette hair. Marian removed the Domino mask off Nick's face. "I need you Robin, help me out of these clothes." Said Marian as Nick untied her dress in order to make it easier to slip off. Marian turned around and removed Nick's cloak and tunic. He then removed the ancient (to him) bra and slowly began removing her loincloth. Marian gasped as Nick disrobed her.
"Remove my codpiece Marian, for I have a surprise inside waiting for you." Said Nick as he smacked his lips before kissing Marian again. Marian moaned as Nick began fondling her breasts.
"Oh Robin! That's wonderful!" Said Marian as Nick paid attention to her breasts with his mouth and a hand strayed down to her nether region. After secretly casting Esuna, Nick tasted Marian.
"Such delightful taste, I must take nourishment from the source." Said Nick as he dove into her crotch. Marian's legs began to tremble as Nick turned her around and sloid his dick between her thighs. "Trap it between your thighs, milady." Said Nick as he began thrusting. Marian was moaning loudly.
"Make me yours, Robin! Said Marian while her lip was quivering. She turned around and kissed Nick, while inserting his penis. "Mmmm!" Said Marian as she raised one of her legs for Nick to grab her and one secured, she raised the other leg to wrap herself around Nick's waist. "Oh Jesus!" Said Marian as Nick got into a pleasurable rhythm. Nick was enjoying Marian's rhythmic bouncing boobs. "I'm cumming nnghRobin! Cum in me!!" As Marian collapsed on Nick's arms, Nick ejaculated hard.
"Sweet nibblets! That was way better than I imagined, Nick!" Exclaimed Marian before covering her mouth.
"Iconic vixen maiden say wha?" Replied Nick before Renet showed up.
"Oh Hi, Nick! Destiny!" Said Renet. "Let's go back to 2024 where we can speak freely. By the way Ashley outdid herself with the transfiguration technique." Grabbing both 'Robin' and 'Marian'
Renet returned them to the MuTeens NYC HQ.
---
Nick's Basement Level:
Renet dropped the two time travelers at Nick's couch. The transfiguration technique began to undo itself and revealed both Nick and Hannah Montana.
"Surprise!" Exclaimed Hannah. "Sorry for the deception, but a 'Marian' was needed in order t prevent a Time Paradox. Just let Renet explain."
" I made an oopsie when I sent you back to the past. I kinda accidentally May have killed Robin and Marian! But it's ok since you both played the roles. The real Robin Hood hood and Marian didn't have any children, Mainly because they are dead." Said Renet. "Also, Will Scarlet is Robin's half sister." Renet said sheepishly. "She ends up having a daughter with dormant demonic traits."
"So, 'Robin' needed to sleep with a 'Marian'. It needed to be someone that you hadn't slept with. So, by process of elimination it was either Me or Cherry." Said Hannah. "Since Miley only wants to be Nick's friend, Hannah took one for the team."
"So, where do we stand now" Asked Nick.
"Well, we're friends." Said Miley as she removed the Hannah wig. "This is one of yours. Really great quality." Miley hugged Nick hard. "Cheer up, GameDude! Nothing has changed between us... Miley and Nick are friends who will NEVER have sex with each other. Hannah on the other hand, may want to repeat a Robin and Marian. That transfiguration technique can actually make Hannah be a different person from Miley. There's the loophole."
"That kinda sounds like I stuck my dick in crazy." Said Nick as Miley put on the wig again.
"Don't worry about it. Once we do the Bone Dance again, you'll get over your trauma. Besides the idea of being nineteen again seems exciting!" Said Hannah before removing the wig.
"I was there when Batman called Bruce Wayne to Eat Celi's Harley Quinn's pussy in Puerto Rico." Said Miley. "Renet, take me home!"
Nick was sitting on the couch as he realized that he had made love to Hannah Montana. "Oh-oh
There you go again talking cinematic
Yeah, you
You're charming, got everybody star struck
I know how you always seem to go
For the obvious instead of me, but get a ticket and you'll see..." Sang Nick as he sat on the couch with his eyes closed.