Shadow: A MuTeens Side Story:
Shadow: A MuTeens Side Story:
Jones Farm: February 17th:
Shadow's Bedroom:
Shadow was laying down on her bed texting.
Are you back from your Royal duties,Link?
Yeah.Got back for Valentine's. As you may have guessed it was hectic. 😝
Let me guess, you had to 🍆 some 🍑 and now you're 😴
I messed up a few things trying to make everyone feel special during these past 3 days.
Well, you forgot about me!
No, I didn't.I just Finished Darla's Valentine's when you texted me. I WAS going to actually call you.
Calling? What are you some Gen X freak!? Phones are for texting.
Well, then belated Happy💘💘 day, Shadow!
Same, James, lol.
Hopefully the James you're referring to is the AVGN...
SHADOW??
Love ya
😘😉
That wasn't me! That was grandma!
Sure... then tell grandma Jones I love her too!
Shadow clung the phone to her chest. She was blushing, but knew that Nick wouldn't reciprocate her feelings. He had a harem, she was too young for him. Still that didn't change her feelings for him. She sighed.
"Shadow! Don't stay up too late!" Yelled Mrs. Jones.
"Kay Grandma!" Replied Shadow before staring at her MuTeens Poster. "Shadow Cade... has a nice ring to it."
***
Jones Farm: April 30th:
Shadow's Bedroom:
Shadow was getting ready for School as she grabbed her phone.
Happy Birthday GameBoy!🎂🥳🎁
Gtg Grandma is angry.
Thx Shadow. Have an awesome Day at school! 😁👍
Shadow put her phone in her pocket and went downstairs.
"I hope your delay wasn't related to the Nintendo kid your Dad warned me about." Replied Mrs. Jones. "
"Grandma! It's nothing like that. He sees me as a little sister! I'm the one who wants more!" Reply to Shadow.
"Gimme your phone and his number. I wanna talk to him without you warning him." Said Mrs. Jones. "But now, off to school, young lady." Said Mrs.Jones.
One silent drive to school later and Shadow arrived at school.
"Grandma, my phone, please?" Asked Shadow.
"When you get home from school. I'm NOT going to snoop through your phone. Like I said, I don't want you to warn him." Replied Mrs. Jones.
"Fine!" Replied Shadow as she got off her Grandmother's Pick-up truck.
"Have a nice day!" Exclaimed Mrs.Jones as she dialed Nick's Number.
***
Central University of Manhattan: Admissions Office:
Nick was sitting on the waiting room a bit nervous. He was sporting a well groomed dirty blond mullet and a well maintained full beard and wearing a formal outfit.
*ring! Ring!*
"Ah, excuse me, let me take this outside." Said Nick as he exited the office for a second. Noticing the Massachusetts area code number, Nick slightly panicked.
"Hello? " Asked Nick.
"Is this the GameDude?" Asked Mrs. Jones.
"That voice. Mrs. Jones? Did something happen to Shadow?" Asked Nick worried.
"I need to talk to you." Said Mrs. Jones. "It's about Shadow and you."
"Pardon me, I don't want to be rude, but can we do this later? I'm about to enter an interview for my college admission and now isn't the best time for me. How about I drop at your farm in an hour?" Replied Nick. "I have my ways to get faster than the average car. Gotta go, bye!" Nick hung up and reenterd the office.
---
Northampton back roads:
"He hung up on me! That was rude!" Exclaimed Mrs. Jones. "Then again, my son has weird friends." She kept driving to the Jones Farm.
As Mrs. Jones arrived to the Farmhouse, she saw a young man with a goatee and short dark brown hair. He was wearing a tanktop and sweatpants and sporting a tattoo on his right arm.
"Did you wait long?" Asked Mrs. Jones as Nick stood up and helped her with the groceries.
"No ma'am, got here five minutes ago. Just a little tired, since I've never teleported this far." Replied Nick. Mrs. Jones sighed. "I'm Nick."
"I don't like you. I think you're a pervert trying to groom Shadow and I want you to back off!: Said Mrs. Jones while she threatened Nick with a cast iron pan.
"I understand, Mrs. Jones. You have it all wrong. I don't know what your son has told you about me, but my intentions with your daughter are pure." Replied Nick. "In fact here's my phone and you can see all my interactions with Shadow. I've been like a big brother to her. Helping her with homework, talking about her day, helping her deal with her family issues, keeping tabs on her dad. Nothing awful." Handing over the phone, Mrs. Jones scrolled through his conversations with Shadow. She stopped at a pic sent by Shadow which had the notification of image deleted.
"Aha! What's this!?" Asked Mrs. Jones.
"Shadow had sent an inappropriate image, which I deleted when I saw what it was." Replied Nick.
"I see you scolded her for it. What was the image?" Asked Mrs. Jones.
"Shadow in a skimpy bikini or underwear. The point was that it was far too much skin to be sending to a male. After I explained, why it was inappropriate, she never did anything of the sort." Replied Nick. "Look, I'm the father of a Teenage girl myself. I understand why you worry. I worry about Shadow and my daughter Gracie as well." Replied Nick.
"My son says you have a harem, is that true?" Asked Mrs. Jones. "Why such interest in Shadow, if you have an army of girls?"
"So, he told you about the harem. Yes it's true. But it wasn't MY idea. I'm just the de facto phallus in that group. Now, I care about your daughter. I'm also aware that you met your Son's girlfriend, the one he took from me. He probably told you that I 'intend to have Shadow become my thrall' to spite him. That is incorrect. I want to protect her just as her 'uncles' do. Just as you and your son do." Explained Nick. "She's safer texting me at night than going out with random boys and getting into god knows what kind of trouble a hormonal teen would get into."
"Come, I could use your super strength and chop some logs for me." Said Mrs. Jones as she took Nick to the Orchard. "See those two dead trees? Need them chopped and turned to firewood and piled next to the barn. It's Applewood, which is dense."
"That's it?" Asked Nick as he took off his shirt. "Mrs. Jones. Pardon the rude question, but how OLD are you? You look no older than 42 and I know your son is 38. There's no way you had him at 4."
"Well, I am 55." Replied Mrs. Jones with a sly smile. "Buttering me up will not help you, young man!"
"I'm not! I'm being brutally honest. Farmlife has done your body good! And being a badass makes you even hotter!" Replied Nick as he chopped the first tree and gently set the log down. The Second tree was felled just as smoothly. Mrs. Jones seemed a bit flustered as Nick carried both logs and set them near the barn. With a pair of hatchets, Nick took care of the branches and made kindling out of them. "Almost done, Mrs. J! You've made me work out a sweat!" Said Nick as he began chopping the dead logs into firewood sized stumps. Grabbing one stump, Nick Spat some fire to dry it. "Yoga flame!" Swiftly he sliced the stump into kiln dried firewood pieces. "Yoga inferno!" Yelled Nick as he kiln dried the rest of the wood before slicing it. "All done!" Said a slightly tired Nick.
"Young man! Not even Steve and Metalhead can clear a tree that fast and you did too! You can call me Ma." Said Mrs. Jones. "You need a bath, young ma... Nick. Follow me." Said Mrs. Jones as she took Nick inside. Taking him to her Bedroom, Mrs. Jones pointed to the Bathroom. "Bath's right there. I'll bring you some of Arnie's old clothes for you to wear while your dirty clothes get washed. Leave them on the basket by the door." Said Mrs. Jones as Nick stripped.
As Nick began filling the tub Mrs. Jones came in and stripped. Nick tried to avert his gaze, but the older woman's body was beautiful. Yes, there were some stretchmarks from giving birth many years ago, there was some slight sag that comes with age, but at the same time, there was obvious firmness of a woman who worked hard. Nick gulped hard as he tried to cover his growing erection.
"Don't. Seeing you get hard by my presence is the greatest gift I've ever gotten since my Husband's death. I also noticed today's your birthday, so let me give you a present, young man..." said Mrs.Jones as she grabbed Nick's dick from behind. Her calloused hands gave Nick a newfound sensation as she stroked him. Feeling her nipples harden on his back, mad Nick's dick twitch a little. "If it's twitching from just my hand, wait until I get it inside. But first let's clean you up!" Said Mrs. Jones as she lathered up her boobs and began rubbing them on Nick's back. "Turn around, Son, Ma's gonna clean you up!" Said Mrs.Jones as she rubbed herself on Nick.
"Mrs. Jo-"
"Call me Ma if you want your birthday present, son." Said Mrs. Jones. "Let's take this to the bedroom as bathtub can be slippery."
As they got to the Bedroom, Mrs. Jones pushed Nick to the bed. "Now let me take care of your sizeable problem." Mrs. Jones purred, as she began stroking Nick and kissing his glans.
"Precum already. You need to work on your stamina, son."
"Ma, trust me. Stamina, I've loads. I did chop them trees earlier." Said Nick as he painted Mrs. Jones face.
"I see. Still hard, Son? Turn your body facing the foot of the bed. I need to put my reins on the headboard." Said Mrs. Jones as she slipped a pair of leather reins to the bed. "Mama's gonna ride you now." Mrs. Jones purred as she slowly slipped unto Nick's dick. Despite eagerly accepting Nick, Mrs. Jones felt incredibly tight.
"Whoa... I never thought you'd feel this amazing!" Nick said excitedly
"Hold on to my butt as the Jones train will leave the station!" Mrs. Jones Exclaimed as she began gyrating her hips and bucking on Nick.
Emitting guttural grunts and animalistic moans, Mrs. Jones rode Nick like a rodeo cowboy hanging on to an angry bull. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" Yelled Mrs. Jones as she tried to use her vaginal muscles to squeeze Nick, who was barely able to moan as he was fading in and out of consciousness. "Hang in there little demon, as this cougar knows how to tame a cocktail or two." Said Mrs. Jones as Nick came inside her. Using her muscles, she kept milking Nick who immediately came a second time before momentarily losing consciousness. "Your body is ready for another round, but is your mind ready for me, Son?" Asked Mrs. Jones as Nick slapped her ass.
"Give it another whirl, Ma." Said Nick as Mrs. Jones started jumping on his pole.
---
Jones Farmhouse: Living Room:
Casey and Shadow entered the Farmhouse as Shadow sat on the couch. Casey looked at his daughter as he grabbed a poker from the chimney. "Shadow, behind me. I have a bad feeling about this. Ma would never be late to pick you up." Said Casey as he began clearing the lower level. Once it was all clear, he heard grunting sounds. "Shad, bathroom! Lock the door!" Casey whispered.
"It sounded like Grandma!" Shadow whispered as Casey put a finger over his mouth.
"Hide!" Whispered Casey. As her father ordered, Shadow hid in the guest bathroom as Casey climbed upstairs silently.
---
Ma Jones' bedroom:
As Nick and Mrs Jones were having wild sex, she asked for dirty talk.
"I'm going to rape your bitch ass and then choke you while I fill you with cum!" Exclaimed Nick in a hoarse voice.
"Fuck! Fuck... you... asshole!" Replied Mrs. Jones as she grunted and squeezed Nick's balls a bit too hard.
"Fuck! That hurt!" Exclaimed Nick as he pinched her nipples.
"Goddamn!" Exclaimed Mrs. Jones. "You'll pay for that!"
Casey took a deep breath before Sparta kicking the door. "Goongala Goonga- Ma! What the fuck Nick!?" Yelled Casey as he bust in the room and saw Nick busting a nut in his mom.
"Nick, fill me up son!" Exclaimed Mrs. Jones as she reached orgasm with Nick pumping his seed deep inside her. "Oh Hi, Arnie!" Exclaimed Mrs. Jones as Nick shot another wad of cum inside her. With an audible plop, Mrs. Jones got off the bed and put on a robe as Nick had a grin on his face.
"Arnie!" Said Nick. "Look at me! I'm your Daddy now!" Said Nick in a mocking tone until he saw Shadow standing behind her father.
"Nick, you asshole!" Exclaimed as Shadow ran outside with Casey trying to go after her. By using VG Logic inventory, Nick required clothing and chased the Joneses. Meanwhile Mrs. Jones came out the bathroom grinning smugly.
"I nipped that Shadow nonsense in the bud and got some fine dick! Ma Jones, you're a genius!" Mrs. Jones thought.
"I wouldn't be so smug yet, Ma..." said April. "Last week I was involved with some Time Traveling Shenanigans that had me interacting with my Grandkids, Henry Jones and Bernice Cade. Seven years or twenty three... You can't stop Nick from becoming Shadow's lover."
***
Woods:
Shadow was running throught the woods near the Jones Farm. She was lost in thought and angry at Nick's betrayal.
"Damn you, Nick! Why did it have to be Grandma and not me? Do you hate my Dad that much?" Thiught Shadow as she accidentally stepped on a booby trap left by one of the local survivalist groups.
"FUCK!" Thought Shadow as she tried to remove the rope that tightened around her ankle and is keeping her upside down. "I hope the assholes who did this don't show up soon."
---
Casey entered the woods looking for his daughter when Nick caught up to him. Jones punched him in the face.
"I deserve that, Son." Said Nick as Casey tried to punch him again. "Keep wasting time, Jones. It's not like Shadow being missing isn't important." Nick said sarcastically.
"This is all your fault, Motherfucker!" Said Casey as Nick used Detective mode to locate Shadow's footprints.
"Technically speaking, your mother fucked me! I simply went along in order to have my revenge on you for stealing April away from me!" Replied Nick. "Besides, this was an obvious harebrained scheme to drove a wedge between Shadow and me." Said Nick. "Which I find ridiculous, by the way, as I see Shadow as a kid sister. We're not alone Jones. Armed subjects 12 of them. Seem like Meal Team 6 members." Whispered Nick. "Didn't you guys clean off a couple of Survivalist hicks from.here a few years ago?"
"Help me save Shadow, Nick... those guys don't like strangers, especially females." Replied Casey as Nick gave Casey a pair of spiked one handed bats. Nick pulled up a few tranquilizer weapons and some special facepaint, camouflage fatigues and ammo. "What the Hell is all that?" Asked Casey.
"Infinite ammo facepaint and this outfit makes my footprints silent. If I add this Little gun I'll be very hard to see and able to tranquilize the Redneck Patrol. I also forgot this one bullet gun has infinite ammo too. The facepaint is for the Sniper rifle." Said Nick as he began to hum Snake Eater. "Jones, we need stealth to save Shadow. Take my EZ Gun. I'll rely on the Tranq mk.22 and The End's Mosin Nagant." Said Nick as he handed the EZ gun to Casey. They split up.
---
Swamp:
Nick began wading the waters and equipped the croc hat. Wading slowly across the swa.py waters, Nick reached a safe distance to take care of two survivalists.
*pomf!* *pomf!*
Two Hicks hit in the neck went unconscious almost immediately. Once out of the water, Nick bound and gagged them in a 69 position.
"Dillo, what's your status? Over" Exclaimed someone over the radio.nick quickly grabbed the radio and started coughing. "Dillo here. *cough cough* all clear over!" Said Nick hoarsely.
"What's with the cough over" Said the other person.
"Choked on *cough* seeds. *cough* over!" Nick replied hoarsely after noticing the bag of sunflower seeds on "Dillo".
"Keep your eyes peeled for intruders. Over!"
Nick crouched and looked around. He saw the glint of sunlight reflecting on a lens. Pulling out the modified Mosin Nagant, he fired a tranq round at the direction of the glint.
*Bang!*
The fauna nearby grew agitated and birds flew away. Swiftly Nick moved silently until he found a rocky area to blend in with his camo. Three more Survivalists showed up.
*pomf!* *pomf!*
Two fell down. The Third one was put on a headlock with a knife at his jugular.
"Speak!" Demanded Nick.
"Fuck you!" Replied the Survivalist.
"Spill the beans or I'll spill your guts!" Said Nick.
"There's over 40 of us. We found a couple of girls including a little one that curses like a sailor." After tonight, we're gonna have our way with then and dispose of the evidence on the nearby hog farm." Said the Survivalist. "I got dibs on the little one..." with those words, Nick sliced the Survivalist's neck open.Then he went and killed the other two survivalists before dragging them out of sight.
"Heh heh! Fei go to sleep, it's Id's time to play." Said Nick as he returned to the Swamp to bring the Tranquilized Survivalists and add them to the pile of bodies before terminating them.
Slinking into the shadows, Nick crept around disposing of the survivalists in the most heinous and stealthy ways using Snake Eater based VG Logic. Force feeding them poison Mushrooms, throwing venomous snakes at them, slitting throats various head and dick shots. Little by little the piles of bodies hidden in the shrubbery were growing until he reached an obviously boobytrapped cabin. No more guards, but Nick knew the obvious traps and the less obvious ones thanks to the loose lips of the Survivalists he interrogated.
"A surveillance camera..." muttered Nick as he calculated the area coverage. "Defusing those Claymores would take to long. Better look for the secret entrance." Muttered Nick as he located the abandoned well.
"Well, well, well... all's well that ends well... my puns might not be medium rare, but I prefer them we'll done!" Nick had to stop himself with the puns. After carefully opening the lid via a hidden brick switch, locating a ladder to the bottom was easy.
"Screw the ladder, I'm the Goddamn Nick R. Cade!" Thought Nick as he jumped down the well and had a soft landing a la Arkham Batman. After putting on some thermal goggles, a far away exit was visible to Nick. Forced to wade through the water, Nick sighed. "I hope this doesn't bring some Sorrow bullshit..."
***
Cabin Basement: Cell:
Shadow was gagged and tied next to a pair of girls. One of them was a blonde Humanoid deer about Nick's age and the other was a black haired girl with half her head shaved. Both were gagged and tied up to the wall.
"Great... if Nick shows up he'll probably Fuck them in front of me to make some point about me being too young for him." Shadow thought.
"Ladies, it seems my friends are a little late to the party. So wait up! Especially you, little miss potty mouth!" Said the Survivalist as he entered the basement. "Horsecock Bill is gonna rearrange your insides!" The survivalist laughed as he saw Shadow's horrified face. Grabbing a Shotgun before going back up, the Survivalist leered at the girls. "Hang on for a bit. I may have to kill some idiotic goalie who's butting in where he shouldn't." Said the Survivalist as he left. Tears began streaming down Shadow's face.
---
Lifting a sheet of metal, Nick gained access to the basement holding cells. Using his lockpicking skills, Nick opened the cell. Putting his finger to his mouth , he signaled the girls to keep quiet. "Shadow."Nick whispered."Did they hurt you?" She shook her head when a loud sound was heard.
*Blam!*
"Shotgun." Nick thought. "I'll be back. Looks like Jones actually made it here." Exclaimed Nick. Since he was wearing the Spirit Camo, Nick's footsteps were silent as he reached the ground floor.
There he saw the final survivalist and Casey was hiding behind the kitchen counter. "I remember you." Said the Survivalist. "You were with the green freaks that killed Skonk! Now you die!"
Nick leapt and flung the. Buster sword towards the Shotgun, denting it and causing the Shotgun to explode by blocking the abrrel when the Survivalist fired.
"You OK, Sportsman?" Asked Nick.
"I'm fine Nintendo!" Exclaimed Casey as Nick turned around and got shot in the Chest as Nick threw a Kunai at the gun hand.
"No!" Exclaimed Casey as he dashed towards Nick. The Survivalist ran to the Basement and grabbed a hostage.
"Fuuuuck! That hurts like crap!" Said Nick as his demonic healing factor spat out the bullet. "Hollow point? I'm going to kill that motherfucker!" Nick and Casey followed to the basement where they saw the Survovalist holding a knife to Shadow's face.
"Let me walk or the little girl gets it!" Said the Survivalist as Casey stood down.
"Cade, you're putting my daughter's life in danger, stand down!" Whispered Casey.
"These assholes want to rape your daughter." Nick whispered back. "I'm gonna kill every one of them." Whispered Nick as he threw down all his weapons.
"Hey! Let the kid go. We're standing down. I will strip down to my underwear and propose a trade. I become your hostage, but the girl is free to go." Said Nick as he removed his jacket and shirt. As Nick tossed the Jacket, Shadow stomped on the Survivalist's foot, which led to the Survivalist's knife cutting Shadow's cheek. Shadow howled in pain as she ran towards Nick and Casey. Nick pulled a Single Action Armyand shot the survivalist between the eyes. With a thud ended the Northampton chapter of CRAP.
"Curaga!" Yelled Nick as he tried to heal Shadow. "Curaga! Curaga! Curaga!" Cried Nick but the magic had little effect. He pulled a suture kit and closed the wound and dressed it as the EPF training indicated.
Casey was confused. "Why isn't your game power working?"
"Silver. The knife was silver plated and that dampens the effect of my magic." Said Nick. "Sadly, Shadow will have a scar from this. Jones I'm sorry. I didn't know that Shadow was going to do that." Said Nick. "There are other prisoner's, Jones. Get them out while I keep trying to heal Shadow's wound. Mighty breeze, heal from the sky, Curaja! Curaja!!" Nick fainted.
"Nick! Wake up! Wake up, dammit!" Shadow cried. "Nick!"
Casey came up with the two girls. They were weak, but they could stand. The Deer girl grabbed the human girl. "I can help her. You help them." She said to Casey.
"Wait! There are Anti Personnel mines. Surprised Jones avoided blowing himself up." Said Nick. "You four head to the basement and stay there for the next hour while I disarm the mines." Carrying the Survivalist leader's corpse, Nick dumped it unceremoniously on the porch. He went to the woods to bring forth the other survivalists and pulled put all of their teeth, removed jewelry, wallets, and other valuables. Afterwards, he tossed the bodies to the minefield before returning to the Basement.
Nick descended the stairs and looked at the group. "Alright, while I cleared the minefield, We'll have to go another way. Cops will be on their way, so hang on to me!" Nocl Exclaimed as he teleported them to the Jones Barn. Nick teleported back to the Survivalist's Base and use the illicit explosove there to blow up the house and basement whole letting enough evidence for the cops to deduce the CRAP members blew themselves up.
***
Jones Farmhouse:
Nick entered the back door to the kitchen where Ma, Casey, Shadow and the others were waiting.
"Mission accomplished." Said Nick. Kneeling before Shadow Nick began sobbing. "I'm so sorry you got hurt, Shadow. I tried my best!" Said Nick as he bowed down to Shadow. "I fucked up, Shadow. So sorry."
Shadow slapped Nick. "You asshole! Why did you fuck Grandma!? To get back at Dad? You sick asshole!" Exclaimed Shadow angrily.
"Actually, I planned it all." Said Mrs. Jones. "I knew Arnie would freak out when he couldn't contact you during school. He'd make the trip here and bring you home where you would catch me and Nick, making you hate him." Mrs
Jones knelt before Shadow. "I thought he was only interested in making you another notch on his belt. I was wrong. Based on what you all told me, He was making sure they wouldn't be able to hurt you anymore." Mrs.Jones looked at Nick. "Boy, I'm sorry. I misjudged you
Thank you for the wonderful sex though. I Don't think you should be around Shadow though..."
"You know what? Let's put an end to this, Mrs.Jones. Casey, Shadow, Mrs.Jones wants me to stay away from Shadow. You three will have to decide, as this is a 'family matter.' But I want to remind you three that I just not only saved Shadow's life, but I saved two other girls' lives and removed 48 rapists/child molesters off this Earth and they were already casing this farmhouse. Saw their plans in one of the rooms while prepping the house to blow up." Said Nick.
"I'll stay away for her well-being. There, I chose for you."
"Wait, Nick." Said Casey. "We've gotten off with the wrong foot. But dude, you fucked my Mom! Pretty much everything with a vagina slips up and lands on your dick! Can you understand why I'm afraid of Shadow walking down the banana plantations with you?"
"Daaaad!" Shadow exclaimed as her face shone beet red. "Yes, I have feelings for Nick, but that's like saying most girls have a crush on Timothee Chalamet, Tom Holland, or Finn Wolfhard. Only difference is that I'm actually friends with my Celebrity crush! He's told me multiple times that he will NOT take advantage of me because he respects me and Dad too much. Sure he's mad that Dad swooped in and swept April off her feet, but he admires you, Dad!" Covering his embarrassment with his hands, Nick tried to make himself smaller.
"So no. I refuse to stay away from my best friend Nick! I'd rather be friend zoned than to lose him completely!" Said Shadow.
"Just keep your wonderful penis away from any of her holes." Said Mrs.Jones.
"Excuse me." Said the Deer girl. "Hi. I'm Jane Doe. They call me Jane Doe because I've no memory of my life aside the past few days. I don't even know if I'm a human turned into a deer or a deer turned into human. But I can detect when people lie or tell the truth." Jane put a hand on Nick's chest and the other on his forehead.
"Do you have bad intentions with Shadow." Asked Jane as she looked at Nick with her Doe eyes.
"No, I don't." Replied Nick
"Do you intend to mate with Shadow?" Asked Jane.
"Not until she becomes a grown up and asks me to." Replied Nick.
"Is LeBron James the Greatest Basketball Player of all time? Asked Jane
"Wait, you know about LeBron? Did Casey put you up to this? Yes." Replied Nick
Jane closed her eyes and let go of Nick.
"He was truthful about Shadow, but not about LeBron James." Said Jane as the dark haired girl laughed.
"Jane, Jane, Jane... your abilities don't work on demons and Mr. Cade her reeks of Demonic Energy. My name is Sage..." replied the dark haired girl.
"I thought it was Gwendolyn." Shadow looked confused.
"Yes, my name is Gwendolyn, but I'm also Sage Wolfsbane, just as Nick is GameDude. It's my 'work name'." Replied Sage. "Dark Hunter... Think of me as a Girl version of the Winchesters."
"How did you know?" Asked Nick. "It was the Teleport, wasn't it?"
Sage chuckled. "Not just that, but your incantations were weakened because of my sage anointed silver dagger.Sage explained. Demons tend to weaken when dealing with silver, holy water, sage, frankincense. It's not like in movies or games where they recoil in pain by them, but it somehow makes their wounds hard to heal when effected by these items. Also, your Aura is strange. Flares like a demon, but feels very human. So I'll say Half-breed." Sage kept looking at Nick. "Since your trouble with the Joneses seems to be sex related, I must assume your Mom was part succubus, making you, oh fuck! An Incubus!" Sage's face became worried.
"Lilith's dead..." Replied Nick. "I'm guessing your expression was related about Lilith and her plans of piercing the heavens with a human and demon army led by her Incubus General was worrying you." Said Nick."This is the part where you sugest some magic mumbo jumbo with salt circles, crystals, essential oils, Holy water and Host wafers blessed by the Pope, silver chains and a Virgin sacrifice to pull the truth out of me, since it's my demonic nature to lie or something." Said Nick condescendingly. "No, I did not lie about Shadow. Yes, while I find you attractive in a 'I just want to have hate sex with you to wipe that smug look off your face', I'd rather not. I just want to head back to New York, because there's a surprise party waiting for me at home. Shadow, Your Uncles Mike and Raph are coming in the summer, I'll be tagging along. See ya in the summer!" Said Nick before hugging Shadow goodbye. "Ma, O'Neil, Jones" Said Mick as he tipped his invisible fedora. "Jane, it was a pleasure. Hopefully I'll see you in summer. Now Gwen, Gwen, Gwen... we can hang out if you mellow out and drop the intimidation act. Remember that I 'easily took 40 dudes with third hand paramilitary training.' A small town occult store college dropout clerk is by far a LOT LESS Scary. So calm your non-existent tits, sister!" Gwen huffed as she covered her chest. "Adios Amigos!" Said Nick while making a bad Raiden impression before vanishing.
"Since when did Nick learn to teleport?" Asked April confused. "Mutants, Aliens, Demons, I really wish I could have a normal life."
Jones Farmhouse: July 3rd:
Porch:
Ma Jones was sitting on the Porch sipping some Apple Juice while Shadow was sitting on the railing with Binoculars. She was wearong a sundress, which was unusual of her and she had stopped dying her hair. Jane was munching on some Japanese Deer Crackers.
"Aren't you a little bit to see your Dad, or is it soneone else you're interested in?" Asked Jane as she ate another Deer cracker. "I hope he brings crackers!" Said Jane. "Why hasn't Gwen shown up?"
"She had to work at the shop today.she needs to catch all the possible customers before tomorrow." Replied Mrs.Jones.
From afar, Shadow noticed 2 RVs and the Turtle Van.
"They're coming!" Exclaimed Shadow as she nearly slipped off the railing while trying to hop off. "Why did I wore this stupid dress?"
The two RVs parked Next to the Barn while the Turtle Vab was parked inside the barn. Following the vans was April in her car along with Casey. After parking in front of the house, Casey and April got off.
"April, Dad!" Exclaimed Shadow as she ran and hugged her father. A tear slipped out of Casey's eye as Shadow was the spitting image of her mom.
"Wow, you've grown so much these past few months! You look so much like your Mom. God..." said Casey as he hugged Shadow and kissed the top of her head.
Out the back, the Turtles came out wearing trenchcoats and fedoras. Splinter was meditating.
"Uncles!" Said Shadow as she went to hug the Turtles. "Is Grandpa Splinter meditating again?"
"You know it..." said Michelangelo. "Nick couldn't make it. Superhero stuff." Shadow seemed visibly disappointed.
Mr. Cade and Aurora got off the first RV and went towards. Mrs. Jones.
"Mr. Cade, this is Ma. Ma, this is Mr. Cade" Said Casey. "That's his wife Aurora. Aurora, Ma, Ma, Aurora." April gently nudged Casey's ribs with her elbow. "Oh Yeah, the harem!" Mrs. Jones and Jane raised an eyebrow.
"Girls! Please come and thank our hosts!" Said Aurora.
Alicia and Carlotta got off the RV followed by Ashley and Natsumi. Natsumi bowed and gave Shadow, Jane, and Mrs.Jones a present. Ashley hugged Shadow and whispered something in her ear. Shadow Blushed. Ashley's eyes widened when she saw Jane. "I want you to be my Deer friend!" Said Ashley as Natsumi facepalmed. Alicia stared down at Mrs.Jones before putting on her sweet mask.
"Hello, Mrs. Jones! My stepbrother has spoken a LOT about you!" Said Alicia in a saccharine voice that was almost creepy. "Hi Jane, Shadow. Would you kindly point me towards the bathroom as my small bladder can'tcpntain huge amounts of liquids." Said Alicia as Shadow took her to the bathroom.
"Please forgive my sister, her bladder is quite pi- small. Sono Carlotta. Piacere." Said Carlotta s she greeted both Jame and Mrs.Jones with Italian air kisses.
Once Alicia and Shadow came back from the bathroom, Gracie jumped out of the second RV and ran towards Shadow. "Wow! You look Amazing, Shadow!" Exclaimed Gracie as she let her tails out and removed the sun hat hiding her ears. Jane felt a bit uncomfortable at the fox girl's presence. "I'm not going to eat you as in nature. Maybe in two years we could eat each other." Gracie winked at Jane. "Oh yeah! Nick sends you some Deer Crackers!" Said Gracie as she pulled a box of them from her purse.
"Ay por fin puedo estorar Las piernas Un rato!" Said Celeste as she got off the second RV.
"Chloe, you'll drive on the way back! I'm not suited for these long drives!" Celeste walked towards everyone. "I'm Celeste." Chloe walked towards the group. "Ma'am, if you need help in the kitchen, I'm your gal!"
"Hello, I'm Chloe. Nice to meet you and thank you for hosting us. Unfortunately, Nick couldn't come with us because he had some 'Superhero business to take care of.' He will arrive at latest by tomorrow morning."
Ashley hugged April and Casey. "I won't need staying as, I have a 4th of July dinner with my Fiancée's parents and with my parents, so I gotta go." Exclaimed Ashley before digitizing herself.
---
Shadow's room: Few minutes earlier:
Alicia told Shadow to keep quiet as they got to her room. Nick was sitting on her bed. Shadow squealed before running towards Nick and hugging him. He gave her a kiss on her forehead and on her cheek right on her barely visible scar.
"Wow! You look beautiful!" Said Nick. "As a friend... of course!" Nick whispered awkwardly. "I'll be here tonight." Whispered Nick as he leapt out the window and vanished.
Shadow and Alicia went back to the others.
Alphonse Wolfe's Occult Shoppe and Apothecary:
Nick came out of the bathroom after washing his hands. Gwen looked disappointed. "Why didn't you let me see? I am curious on how we're you able to use your semen demon possession."
"No time for that, Sage... You called me to help you rescue your Dad... which is weird, since he's a famous Dark Hunter and a reason why my Succibi have been less active around despite Lilith's Discretion Edict. Your Dad is making my life a pain." Reploed Nick mildly annoyed. "Let's go!" *story will be continued on Sage Wolfsbane Dark Hunter 1
***
Jones Farm: July 3rd, 9PM:
Casey and April were sitting on the Porch,when Ma Jones ad the Cades came.out carrying cranberry juice and some light snacks.
Mr. Cade pulled out a bottle of rum and poired cranberry juice in it.
"Don't worry, Ma! I can't get drunk. IS Government tested a super soldier formula on me." Said Mr. Cade.
"I'm worried that you brought avtial Caribbean Rum and aren't sharing." Said Ma as she grabbed the bottle from Mr. Cade. "Do not give any liquor to Aurora. She's pregnant." Said Ma. "Arnie, you ain't drinking?"
"Nah, Ma. I've sworn off the liquor." Said Casey.
"I have some Zagam in the RV... Ma, you gotta try this!" Said Mr. Cade.
"Zagam, what's that?" Asked Ma.
"Demonic beer Ma, don't drink it..." said Casey while his face was full of terror.
"It's harmless if you dilute it with Holy Water or have a host before drinking." Said Mr. Cade. "Silver cups or goblets also mellow out the effects."
*pomf!*
A winged creature crashed in front of the Jones Farm holding both Gwen and her father Alphonse. "Fuckdammit!" Exclaimed the Red haired Creatire as it transformed into Nick. "¡Me cago en la crica del diablo, coño! Fucking Dhampirs! I fucking Hate Vampires!! They're a blight in the Succibi lineage! Ahora tengo que bregar con la mierda de vampiros y no estoy hablando del trolazo mutante." Nick kept rambling on as he tended his wounds. "He doesn't deserve it, but give him this. Artificial Blood.. staves off the hunger better than eating non-human animals. All the nutrients, none of the side effects."
Mr. Cade went towards the trio. "Are those the bloodpacks that Carm used to drink?" He took one and smelled it. "The formulation is different." He had a small sip. "The anticoagulation agents don't have An aftertaste... Did you use synthesized Verdosian Blood? " Mr
Cade asked.
"Jenny and Dr. Joaquina did. Your ideas were sound Old Man. Shame that we aren't lab types." Nick said as Mr. Cade handed the bag to Gwen who drank the pack.
"Dhampirs? What the Fuck is a Dhampir?" Asked Casey.
"A Dhampir is a Vampire/Human Hybrid." Said Alphonse. "Mrs.Jones, Ah, If it isn't New York's Channel 6 Ace Reporter, April O'Neil. You're dating Jones? That's kinda sad." Alphonse took a whiff in the air. "I smell A Rat, Turtles, and some new mutants... But YOU!" Alphonse turned towards Mr. Cade. "Are you Nicolás Barril? Son of Ramón Barril who was son of Teófilo Barril?"
"Don't tell me you.know Grandpa Teo?" Said Mr.Cade.
"I met Teófilo in his youth. But that's not important." Replied Alphonse. "Your blood has been tampered with. It's Unnatural. Disgusting even. Reminds me of the Wunderstein clan's Heracles formula. I thought I wiped out the Wundersteins in 1648..."
"¡Tremendo! ¡Hasta los vampiros conocen a mi viejo!" Said Nick. "Ma, I'm gonna take a shower. Can you please keep the girls away, so I can shower undisturbed?"Nick asked before going inside. Shadow saw Nick enter and was about to jump to hug him bit Natsumi caught her.
"Let Nikku-onii cool down and freshen up. Trust me. Even Alicia is keeping away. She knows now is not the moment to hound him."
---
Jones Farmhouse: Porch 20 minutes later:
Nick had to summon a couch from inventory for the girls to sit with him. Gwen was mad that she wasn't allowed to be with Nick.
Alphonse sat on a chair in front of Nick.
"This is most interesting. You are not using Incubus magic on your thralls... one would think an Incubus would req-"
"Let's put our cards on the table, Phonse..." Nick interrupted. "Yes, I'm the Incubus Lilith HAD BEEN WAITING FOR. No, I'm not interested in enslaving humanity. I'm attempting to reform Succubus culture in order to promote coexistence between humans and Succubi... since I am both Incubus and Human. Same thing with Mutants. But self-loathing Vampires like you, are making my dream impossible!"
"Dream, that's the operative word." Replied Alphonse. "But I digress...I got captured when I was doing some investigating on The Big Guy... Vlad Tepes. Yes, Dracula is real, No, he hates how movies represent him. Twilight is, ironically, the closest thing to true Vampiric lore. It only misses the more Cronenbergian abilities. Put away that garlic! It's annoying it messes with my nose." Alphonse was getting annoyed. "Well, Ma Jones, we'll be here tomorrow morning to help your family get together. If we'd need help with Tepes. Gwendolyn shall stay the night and will not leave the Incubus out of her sight." Alphonse transformed into a swarm of locusts and left the Farmhouse.
"I trust Alphonse's judgment, so Gwen, you are going to stick to Nick like peanut butter on jelly." Said Mrs. Jones. "Especially if he has to go to the bathroom." Nick groaned.
"Girls, I'm sorry, but Retarded demons are being annoying and ruined our fun. Fucking Vampires..." said Nick. "Can't use clones, because, Fancy McAsstard can make inferior bloodclones and would ruin sexy time. I'LL BE BACK!" Nick super jumped and air dashed away from the farm with Gwen close behind.